Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
