There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
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