You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
me + whiskey = a bad person
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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