Having a random hookup so left but love u
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
