plz talk dirty to me
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
