We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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