Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
