You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
