Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize