im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Randomize
