I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
