Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
