Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
should my penis look like a turkey
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
