whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize