We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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