Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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