i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
