i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
