Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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