Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
