I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
