There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
