the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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