I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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