so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
