dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
