You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
