You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
