Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
