I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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