Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
