I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
