Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
