She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
