She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You were trust falling into bushes
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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