i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
if i can run in heels then i can drive
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
