moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
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