yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I want her autograph on my taint
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
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