I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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