i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
you win again, gameday.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
