I think I just saw someone hide a body.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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