OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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