I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
