I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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