so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
