grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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