I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
