I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
