Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
