I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
