If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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