you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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