I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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